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80-year-old couple, texting

Something for all you romantics . . .
An elderly couple had just learned how to send text messages on their mobile phones.
The wife was a romantic type and the husband was more of a no-nonsense guy.
One afternoon the wife went out to meet a friend for coffee.
She decided to send her husband a romantic text message and she wrote:
“If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.  If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite.  If you are drinking, send me a sip  If you are crying, send me your tears……..
I love you.”
The husband texted back to her:
“I’m on the toilet.  Please advise.”

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The Original Constitution Defender

General A. Horn

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I Can See Russia

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The Black Hole

Received this video from a Friend

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A mind bender. This is GOOD!

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The Black Hole

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Click link below for video (then hit play):

https://www.youtube.com

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Shhh….Monday

 

Feel the feeling but don’t become the emotion. Witness it.  Allow it.  Release it.
Worrying doesn’t take away tomorrow’s troubles, it takes away today’s peace.

Lil Johnny saves the day

Donald Trump was visiting a primary school in Orlando and visited a grade four class. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.
The teacher asked Mr. Trump if he would like to lead the discussion on the word ‘tragedy.’
So your illustrious President asked the class for an example of a ‘tragedy’.
One little boy stood up and offered: “If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs him over and kills him, that would be a tragedy.”
“No,” said Trump, “that would be an accident.”
A little girl raised her hand: “If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone, that would be a tragedy.”
“I’m afraid not,” explained Trump. “That’s what we would call great loss.”
The room went silent. No other child volunteered.
Trump searched the room. “Isn’t there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?”
Finally at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher held her breath.
In a quiet voice he said: “If the plane carrying you was struck by a ‘friendly fire’ missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy.”
“Fantastic!” exclaimed Trump, “That’s right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?”
“Well,” says Johnny, “It has to be a tragedy, because it sure as hell wouldn’t be a great loss… and you can bet your sweet ass it wouldn’t be an accident either!”
The teacher quickly left the room!

Translator – SNL

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Three scientists (Scarlett Johansson, Kyle Mooney, Mikey Day) receive a shock when they debut their invention, a machine that translates for pets.

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Click link below for video:

https://www.youtube.com/

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